Happy New Year, Mets fans!

The doom and gloom that was 2016 is over and now we can start fresh in 2017.

2016 had its ups and downs. We clinched a Wild Card berth but failed to advance past the Wild Card game. We didn’t have Matt Harvey, Jacob deGrom and Steven Matz for the better part of the year but Noah Syndergaard came into his own and we were pleasantly surprised by Seth Lugo and Robert Gsellman. David Wright missed practically the whole season thanks to a herniated disk in his neck that did NOT have any relation to the spinal stenosis but I finally achieved my decade-long dream of taking a selfie with him. You catch my drift, ups and downs.

Two days ago on Twitter, I saw a resolutions list on Twitter that completely upset me (Shameless plug, go follow me on Twitter if you don’t already) because it had dumb resolutions like “go to more home games” and “I will not curse at the television.” However, the one that made me sad as a human being was “I will appreciate David Wright.” Like, who DOESN’T appreciate David Wright? Seriously, point them out. I will give them a piece of my mind.

Metsolutions, like resolutions, need to be realistic otherwise two weeks into a new baseball season, we will all be cursing life and making sarcastic comments about the Mets. For example, I don’t live in New York so I can’t go to more home games. I can, however, resolve to make another trek up to Citi Field and catch them when they’re on the road. So, allow me to tear this dumb Twitter (courtesy of @athletelogos) list apart piece by piece, shall we?

1. I will go to more home games. Okay, so it’s hard for people to go to more home games whether it be for financial reasons or for travel reasons or whatever life throws at you, but thanks to modern technology, I can get Gary, Keith, and Ron in my living room! So how about resolving to watch more Mets games? It’s doable guys.
2. I will not curse at my television. HA. HA. HA. Cursing at my television is the cornerstone of my Mets-watching experience. I curse AT the stadium when I’m there; watching the games at home just lets me watch games without a filter. So instead of watching games like a prude and not cursing at the TV every time someone bobbles a ball or David Wright can’t make the throw to first, why don’t we all resolve to be more patient with the team? You can still curse when they do something really stupid, but I’ve gotten really good at shaking everything off as something that would happen to the Mets.
3. I will stay up for west coast games. We all dread that week when the Mets are on their west coast swing, and this year we play the American League West so that west coast swing became longer. Most of us have day jobs, I get it. But usually, there’s a point where the game is obviously over and fatigue sets in. So, instead of waiting up to watch the Mets lose 3-2 in 16 innings and hating life the next morning, why don’t we all resolve to stay awake until the point no return? It doesn’t make you a bad fan to not watch the game; it just means you’re a responsible adult.
4. I will avoid Yankee fans at all costs. Impossible. Also childish. We should be nicer to the Yankee fans; not all of them totally suck and it makes us look like the better fanbase.
5. I will appreciate David Wright. This makes me sad as a human being. There’s people out there that actually hate on David Wright because he either “makes too much money so we can’t sign a free agent” or “he’s wasting a roster space so we can’t make a trade.” Suck it up, buttercups. David Wright is a Met until he tearfully announces his retirement with his wife and his daughter beside him. I just can’t even. Let’s just all be realistic in our expectations.
6. I will expect injuries in advance. Okay, I can live with this one mainly because #MetsTwitter is notorious for hoping for the best and expecting the worst. We label players “dead” when they pull a hammy. So, I’m putting it on the Mets to hire a new medical staff. Please?
7. I will wash my lucky shirt. No, I won’t. I will, however, to continue to follow any superstition as long as they continue to work.
8. I will not insult Ty Kelly. Ty Kelly might be in Vegas next year soooooooo why is this even on the list? And I will insult the suckiest player on the team; it’s in my nature. I will try to be nicer to them in my insults, however.
9. I will forgive Cespedes for not hustling. Most Mets fans love Cespedes. It’s a Cespedes for the rest of us but if his not hustling costs us the game, then we have every right to be mad. I will have faith that Terry Collins will address the lack of hustle to Cespedes and maybe put in my favorite late-inning defensive replacement, Juan Lagares.
10. I will not (always) blame Terry Collins. Blaming Terry Collins is in everyone’s nature. Even if it’s not his fault, it’s his fault. What works one day doesn’t always work the next day. We should resolve to analyze the situation for what it was, and if we want to direct blame, then direct it at Carlos Beltran.
11. I will be grateful for the pitching staff. Sandy Alderson has turned down some great players so that his pitching staff could stay in tact and when they’re all healthy, we will have one of the best pitching rotations in baseball. This shouldn’t even be on the list, but whatever.
12. I will watch Wright and Reyes turn two. This is 2017, not 2007. Asdrubal Cabrera is the every day shortstop. This goes back to being realistic about our expectations for David. Any day we see Wright and Reyes on the field will be a good day.
13. I will not cheer for Daniel Murphy. This goes back to being childish. Daniel Murphy single-handedly took the 2015 Mets to the World Series; it’s not his fault Sandy Alderson didn’t offer him a contract past the qualifying offer. It’s also not his fault that he got the best contract offer from a hated division rival. Appreciate Murph for what he’s done, not the uniform he currently wears.
14. I will practice good fundies. FUNDIES!!!! KEITH!!!! We all love when Keith talks fundies. But there’s good fundies both on and off the field. Stay classy, Mets fans.
15. I will not cry when Bartolo faces us. Yes I will. We’re all entitled to a good cry but I know Mets fans will be nothing but respectful for Bartolo because he’s a legend. Thanks for one of the best moments of 2016.
16. I will attend a World Series game. Is this implying the Mets will get to the World Series? They have to stay healthy and get there first. Who knows what will happen over the course of 162 games? Let’s keep the expectations real.
17. I will always believe. Tug said it best, “Ya gotta believe!” Mets fans always believe. It’s in our DNA. Never give up. Hope is what brings us together as one.